Weird Product Instructions

On Sears hair dryer: "Do not use while sleeping."

On a bag of Fritos: "You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside."

On a Swann frozen dinner: "Serving suggestion: Defrost."

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating."

On Nytol sleep aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness."

On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only."

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."

On a Korean kitchen knife: "Warning: Keep out of children."

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of the box): "Do not turn upside down."

On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."

SEE MORE HERE

SILLY PATENT# US 6983493: Retractable Table Top for a Toilet

Retractable Table Top
for a Toilet
patent#: US 6983493
view the full patent

Some of the best ideas come when you're sitting on the john. It's as if opening one end to eliminate the physical, we make more room on the other side for the metaphysical. One might conclude then that the more time you sit on the toilet, the more inspiration you will receive.

Rafik Shaumyan has at last conquered the "shortcomings" of standard facilities with his table top: "A device for providing a working surface while a user is seated on a toilet."

Shaumyan has thoroughly analyzed society's plebian use of the crapper and restored its royal dignity. As he puts it:

"The toilet seat can more rightly be called "the throne" if certain conditions are met above and beyond the simple support and flush provisions. A supply of toilet paper needs to be furnished and at a convenient location or locations, not a marginally accessible location. A supply of reading material from which a selection can be made is usually welcome, and for some an ashtray, cigarettes and matches are needed. Some may prefer to prepare notes such as shopping lists, and these will need pencil and notepaper and backing for the note paper. "

All the convenience fit for a king.

VISIT THE SILLY PATENTS WEBSITE

Silly Walks Generator from Monty Python

This is goony but a fun way to waste time. HINT: DO watch the tutorial FIRST. You can choose background and character and the character's movements are entirely up to you.
VISIT THE WEBSITE.

More Fun from Bored.com!

Destroy Any Website
Um, yeah, you type in the url, choose your method of destruction from flamethrower to bird poop to tire tracks and many more, then click away! Hee hee, I typed in www.whitehouse.gov just for the heck of it then bird pooped right on Georgie's head!

Let Your Personality Be Analyzed by Your Artwork
You have to create a tree, house, or person then your personality is analyzed. Here is my drawing:

Your personality analysis based on this drawing:You are conflicted about something and unsure what to do about it.The nurturing you get from others is not very predictable.You tend to concern yourself too much with thinking about the negative consequences of things.You strive for achievement.

George W. Bush's Hotmail Account

Real Country Music Song Titles
These are real. What's scary is that I recognize some of them.

Listen to a Song Backwards
For many years there have been rumors that certain songs, speeches, and ads contain hidden subliminal messages that can only be heard when played backwards. This is known as backmasking, and there is much debate about its existence. Use our website to find out for yourself if it is true. Or, listen just for the fun of it.

The Rock, Paper, Scissors Game
Play this classic kids game online

Bored.com Arcade
Play free video games online such as Pac Man, Tetris, Frogger & many others.

Male Restroom Guide and Female Restroom Guide

Oxymoron List
The largest list of oxymorons ever collected online.

What Famous Things Happened on Your Birthday?

Weird Web Stuff

Weird Web Stuff

I love to "collect" bits and pieces of weirdness I discover on the web (in case you can't tell by what's already here). So here's a few more additions for you to enjoy:

What is "breatharianism" and what happens to the people who practice it?Not a real good idea if you plan on staying alive. These folks really believe their physical bodies can sustain themselves solely on air and sunshine. No food. No water. Ever. Except, of course, for one of their major spokespersons who got photographed at a Wendy's hamburger joint, chowing down on a whole bunch of junk food.

Science Toys
Some of this stuff is passing strange, such as the robotic hand that plays six piano pieces. All by itself. Anyone remember that old sci-fi movie, "The Five Fingered Monster?"

Watermelon Fruit Carving
The guy is an artist. With watermelon.

Secret and Hidden Places at Google Earth
The link will take you to the YouTube page for this interesting little video of "secret" locations discovered using Google Earth. There will be even more links to even more "Google Earth Secret Locations" pages listed here.

Weird Facts
Did you know that Jimmy Carter was the first U.S. president to have been born in a hospital? Or that in every episode of Seinfeld there is a Superman somewhere. The first toilet ever seen on television was on "Leave It to Beaver". Reno, Nevada is west of Los Angeles, California. And there's lots more where that came from!

Byberry Abandoned Mental Hospital
Okay, this is just creepy. The creepiness continues with "Legend of the John Doe Morgue." Oh oh. I just found The Byberry Archives.

How to paint the MONA LISA with MS PAINT

So you think you hate your driver's license photo?
Check out what these guys did to screw with their own DL pics on purpose.

Homeless Black Little Person Gets a Job from the Cops

Weird Picture Archive